The relationship of Prana, the Prana of relationships

by Sandra Radja

We train—consciously or unconsciously—for what we look for and what we see. What we look for and see shapes our experience. If—and I would say this is a truism in Eastern thought—our prana (life force) follows our focus or attention, then we feed what we focus on. We nourish what we see.
— Dr Claudia Welch

This is the point. You chose a partner to focus on, to use as your mirror and reflect from.  The chemical reaction (if you're of the mindset that the love feeling accompany the union) provided a solution to your weaknesses and there seemed to be a greater union by two.  But then.  It became ordinary or out of alignment with your new growth spurt or the initial crush had no substance. And then a dis-solution.

We are relationships.  Not only to your love partner but in friendships and business and pleasure and community and country and the global perspective. In any aspect of these is the requirement that we pay attention. And to pay attention requires the cultivation of Prana. 

The elusive Banksy in quiet revolution

The elusive Banksy in quiet revolution

So this is the point of your Yoga class.  You not only get to practise being comfortable with your body, moving into poses of attention for various organs and chakras and so forth, but it helps you to practise awareness.  The body, in this instance, is the tool and the idea is that the practise then feeds into your mind state. Yoga does not have to be it.  Choose anything - archery, tai chi, cooking, sewing, learning a language.  The purpose is to refine the sense of paying attention.

Clarity is possible when we practise choiceless passive awareness. In that awareness you are completely open to the other person. You are not judging according to your own pattern or ideas or past experiences. Just look at the person NOW with a totally fresh clear mind, an open heart. And in that listening there is communication.
— Dr Vasant Lad

Dr Lad brings the idea of communication being the bridge that holds two people together.  For it is the only means of understanding the heart of your union. It is recommended to be able to be on the same page, or consciousness level, as the other.  In the above photo one would agree that the couple are on the same page.  But something is missing - the act of paying attention, or re-directing prana/focus to the other.  We can only do that with intention.  The couple might be on the same page, but they are not deeply listening. The more the lack of focus the more the veil of the unconscious mind reigns and within this space comes evaluation, judgement, and criticism.  You're setting yourself up to fail.

And as usual, we don't necessarily need to look directly at relationship issues. Because if the tools aren't sharp there isn't any point in sawing the wood. So work on yourself, on your ability to focus which will lead to the ability to listen.  In the very seed of sincere listening comes clarity and compassion and therefore love.  You need little more.