I'm writing in response to a reader, who reached out with a situation in regards to a teenage crisis. Here's my take on the matter (with permission). The backdrop = rebellion.
Definition of rebellion is the action or process of resisting authority, control, or convention.
Focusing in - rebelling is resistance.
I have a good friend who's kid is going through a similar scenario. I was visiting her last year and observed the two of them together. I've known both her and child for many years now, so I felt ok to make an opinion in one of our discussions. When I asked her whether, in some small way, she thought it was kind of awesome that he was rebelling like this, and that maybe, maybe? there was a part of her that felt like doing the same, she stopped and stared at me and looked a little stumped.
"Maybe so" was her answer.
I am a huge believer that your kids are part of your own psyche until they form their own belief systems from their own experiences. When a kid is no longer affected by their parents, then they are fully formed. This may not ever happen for some. Until that point, I do believe there is an invisible tether that keeps the desires bound together.
Your consternation is theirs. To heal your kids, as a parent, it always come back to you. And as a mother, you have the greatest power of creation. You create human form, you can also create the vibe in which that form resonates.
I've seen so much literature out there determining how kids grow and the phases they go through. Biologically that's true, however, not all kids (like not all adults) grow the same way!! The only constant that I have observed is the connection to parent.
Dr Claudia Welch gave me some advice when I needed it working with a parent/child situation I felt was out of my league. She advised me to turn to pranayama, since it was the overriding organising principle of the body. It is prana that heals us all.
So mama - to you I say centre yourself, balance the hemispheres through pranayama. Rebellion cannot sustain itself when there's no fuel to it's fire.
Blessings to you. x